Plenty of research shows that when employees feel their managers and senior leaders genuinely listen to their ideas and concerns, work relationships strengthen, engagement grows, and performance gets better. That’s why bosses hold regular one-on-ones with their teams, new division leaders go on listening tours, and CEOs host all-staff meetings and town halls. But studies also reveal that these efforts often fall flat—partly because many managers just aren’t great listeners. After reviewing 117 academic papers on workplace listening—whether in private chats, team discussions, or larger meetings—we found this skill is much easier to describe than to actually do.
Why? Because listening takes real effort—it demands empathy, patience, and the ability to respond thoughtfully. And since it can be mentally draining, especially when topics are complex or emotionally charged, people often cut corners or tune out entirely.
Take Google’s old all-company TGIF meetings. For years, these biweekly forums let leaders share updates, discuss strategy, and take employee questions. They were key to maintaining trust at the company. As Laszlo Bock, Google’s former head of HR, once put it, they covered “everything from whether the café food was too healthy to deep ethical questions about company strategy.” But by 2019, CEO Sundar Pichai decided the meetings weren’t working. Employees wanted to debate tough issues like hate speech and sexual harassment, and discussions kept leaking to the press. Pichai scaled them back and changed the format. Listening to everyone had become too hard.
Similar situations played out at Activision Blizzard, where a town hall meant to address harassment claims led to a massive walkout—workers accused leaders of downplaying concerns instead of addressing them. At Amazon, employees said daily sentiment surveys were skewed by managers pressuring them to give positive answers and fears that responses weren’t anonymous.
Our research shows even well-meaning leaders often fail at listening. We’ve identified five big reasons: haste, defensiveness, invisibility, exhaustion, and inaction. Here’s how to avoid these traps and become the listener your team needs.
1. Haste
In April 2023, MillerKnoll CEO Andi Owen held a virtual town hall. She knew morale was low. For employees (including herself) to get bonuses, the company had to hit a revenue target—and sales were lagging. But Owen believed a final push could turn things around. “I wanted them to acknowledge, ‘Yeah, it stinks we’re behind,’ then move on and focus on finishing strong,” she later told Fast Company.
Then came the question on everyone’s mind: What about our bonuses? Owen’s response went off track. “Don’t ask, ‘What if we don’t get a bonus?’” she said. “Focus on hitting the numbers. My old boss used to say, ‘You can visit pity city, but you can’t live there.’ So leave pity city!” A clip of her remarks went viral, hitting nearly 6 million views and sparking backlash.
Owen fell into the haste trap. Her reply came at the end of a long meeting, with little time for Q&A or prepared answers—so she spoke too quickly. Busy leaders juggling multiple teams often do this.
But rushed listening can be worse than not listening at all. Quick responses leave people feeling dismissed or unimportant. And if you miss key details in your hurry, you might make poor decisions that demotivate your team.
Good listening takes time and focus. People feel heard only when you show genuine interest, pay full attention, and confirm understanding.
To avoid hasty replies, set aside distraction-free time for conversations. This shows you care about the other person’s perspective and ensures nothing gets overlooked. If you can’t address something right away, schedule a follow-up.
Even in tense moments (like Owen’s), you can slow down. Ask clarifying questions—it helps you grasp the full picture and encourages openness. And resist interrupting. Research (including a study from Italy’s Second University of Naples) shows interruptions rarely go over well. Your first job is to understand, not respond.
2. Defensiveness
When employees voice concerns or criticism, defensiveness is a common knee-jerk reaction. Clearlink CEO James Clarke, for example, got defensive when employees pushed back on a sudden return-to-office policy requiring four days in-office for those near HQ. Instead of listening, he questioned dissenters’ motives, doubted working moms’ productivity, and even praised an employee who sold her family dog to comply.
Owen’s response was similarly defensive—she shut down the bonus question outright. Pichai’s shift to TGIFs focused on business (not tough topics) also reads as defensiveness.
These reactions backfire. Dismissed employees disengage, eroding trust and morale. Research by Guy Itzchakov, Avraham Kluger, and Dotan Castro shows that when listeners stay open and empathetic, speakers handle disagreement better.
The fix? Pause before reacting. If you feel criticized, restate what you heard or thank the speaker for sharing. Ask follow-up questions. This keeps you from lashing out and shows you’re truly listening.
3. Invisibility
Many managers listen but don’t show they’re listening, making them seem indifferent. Leaders might work behind the scenes on issues raised in surveys but fail to communicate progress. Or they understand employees but give no visible signs of engagement.
Pichai, for instance, hasn’t stopped listening to Google employees—by most accounts, he’s attentive. But by changing TGIFs, he removed a visible symbol of openness. Similarly, in a 1992 presidential debate, George H.W. Bush checked his watch before answering a voter’s question about the recession. His response was overshadowed by the gesture, which made him seem eager to leave.
To avoid seeming disconnected, use “back channeling”—eye contact, nodding, open posture. Research by Janet Bavelas shows these cues make conversations more productive.
Verbal acknowledgments (“I see,” “That makes sense”) also signal engagement. And summarizing what you’ve heard (“So your concern is the deadline might not allow enough testing?”) confirms understanding and prevents miscommunication. Leaders can use this in emails after surveys or all-hands meetings, too.
4. Exhaustion
Exhaustion kills listening. When leaders are drained, they can’t focus or engage. Picture a manager after back-to-back meetings, skipping lunch, zoning out on a late call with a team member.
Google leaders likely felt this as TGIFs piled up with tough employee concerns. At a small startup, weekly all-hands work. At 100,000 employees? Much harder. Owen, Clarke, and Bush Sr. were probably exhausted when they made their missteps.
Research by Christopher Rosen shows managers bombarded with complaints eventually burn out and mistreat staff.
The solution? Set boundaries. Block open/closed hours on your calendar, cap discussion times, or take breaks during long talks.
If you’re exhausted, reschedule. Admitting you need energy to listen well shows respect. And share the load—don’t be the only “office therapist.” Rotate who runs listening forums like TGIFs to prevent burnout and foster collective responsibility.
5. Inaction
The worst pitfall? Listening but not acting. Google’s slow response to sexual harassment concerns in 2018 led to a 20,000-person walkout—and fueled tension in TGIFs.
Research confirms that inaction erodes trust. A study of nurses during Covid found many felt “unheard and alienated” because meetings with managers led nowhere.
The fix: Always close the loop. Before ending a conversation, recap next steps and set a follow-up timeline. Be transparent about what you can/can’t do and why. If budget or policy blocks a change, say so—this can spark workarounds.
Listening is hard work. It takes focus to avoid these five traps. But if you master it, you’ll build trust, reduce misunderstandings, and drive real change. Don’t let haste, defensiveness, invisibility, exhaustion, or inaction hold you back.
